Europeans: I drove forty minutes to the Netherlands for some groceries and then I popped into Germany to see some of my relatives before driving back home.
Americans: I was in Florida, I drove for nine hours, now I'm still in Florida.
#australians: i drove for nine hours #now i'm nine hours away from home #no one is here #the streets are empty #how did this happen #where has civilisation gone #i am alone in the universe #oh wait no there's an echidna it's okay
Canadians: We left Toronto 2 days ago, We are still in Ontario, food is scarce. We are lost, soon we will have to eat each other to survive, oh wait there's a tims we're good.
Russians: I was in Yakutia, I drove for twenty eight hours, now I'm still in Yakutia, I travelled by train for 6 days, I'm still in Russia. Don't even try to leave Russia. Don't forget: you're here forever. Accept it and suffer.

Send me ‘Have You Evers’ and I will reply with Yes or NO

(Source: megan-hansenn)

Anonymous sent: did you seriously just reblog a post saying all men/white cis males suck? seriously?

My dear anonners.  Are you talking about the post I reblogged with pictures that says: “Posts that say all white cis males suck” *hilarious reaction picture* “posts saying all men suck” *hilarious reaction picture* and “friends reblogging those posts” *hilarious reaction picture* then you need to get your vision checked.




it takes 237 muscles to fake an orgasm but 15 to say “it’s called a clitoris and it’s right here”

#don’t ever fake an orgasm let them know they disappointed you

*advantages of being a lesbian, never having to fake an orgasm*

(Source: warmbloodedkiller)


It was an accident!

something is wrong with how i internalize things


my face while reading porn:


my face while reading fluff: